Dear Andrew — I wish I could give you a big hug and let you know you are doing a great job. I am so glad you are going easy on yourself during this time. I have spent a lot of years beating myself up about all the things I thought I did wrong, thinking I failed my children so miserably. My youngest is 27 and it has taken me this long to get the message that I did a good enough job to make them into functioning, capable human beings with the capacity to guide their own spiritual, mental and emotional growth.

Keep doing what you are doing. You are right. Your kiddos aren’t suffering and you shouldn’t needlessly suffer, either. A few afternoons of TV will not kill them. Take the time you need to feel better. And remember, there is no such thing as a perfect parent!!

I went through a horrible depression when I was raising my children and then I struggled to get out of a suffocating marriage. Today, when I was talking to my 33 year old son, he said “I love having a mom that’s a badass!” High praise indeed for someone who thought she ruined her kids’ lives. If you want some comfort, read this. And know that I am cheering you on. :)

Human learning to be human. Writing in hopes of getting there.

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